For the last couple weeks, I have been more focussed on Hillary again than I had been for a couple of months prior to that. The dates are a big part of that. A year ago today, this thing happened. A year ago tomorrow, this other thing happened. None of them were pivotal except inasmuch as they were because they were last decisions and final things in her life.
I don't remember a lot from that period now. It was ultimately so short, a month from when things started to get bad. Something like two weeks from when Hillary started to get cognitively impaired.
A year ago today, we were going through the motions with the palliative folks to talk about what it would potentially look like to bring Hillary home at that point. For the first time, when I say we here, I don't mean Hillary and I. I mean myself and Hillary's larger support team. Her parents, my parents, close cousins, and our siblings.
I don't really think any of us thought it was going to be totally possible, but it was important to me at least to ask the questions and think about the feasibility. The meeting would be the following day, but I was doing my research and talking through things on the third to be prepared.
Notably, once she was in the Palliative Care Unit, Hillary never expressed interest to me or anyone else about going home. She was as comfortable there as she would have been anywhere I think. I've repeatedly mentioned her withdrawing from life over those weeks. Leaving home was a part of that.
In hindsight, not attempting it was the right call. She died only a few days later. As much as I was comfortable with Hillary dying at home if she truly wanted that, I'm glad now it didn't turn out that way.